¶ Muffleball Seasonal Republic
The political system in this domain is a Muffleball Seasonal Republic. The championship team installs leaders that rule representing their interests. This has been the system for over 100 years and is generally regarded as a good system. There are no wars, political infighting or strife. A simple and exiting competition determines who rules. Over the last 30 years there has been a consolidation of power amongst a handful of teams that consistently are ranked in the top 3rd of the league. It started slowly at first but in recent years the standings have all but calcified with the Lords of Blades being the dominant team in recent years.
¶ Lords of Blades
Representing the Capital City of Paragon
The Lords of Blades are the undisputed kings of Muffleball, reigning over the league with an iron grip. One of three teams representing the capital city, they are known for their unparalleled discipline, surgical precision, and near-military approach to the game. They play a ruthless but fair game, crushing their opponents with a relentless offensive strategy that leaves no room for counterattacks. Their dominance has led to them being the ruling force in the Muffleball Seasonal Republic for the last decade, and they have no intention of letting go of power.
Their home stadium, The Silver Arena, is a gleaming monument to their greatness, with towering statues of past champions and a pristine, near-sacred playing field.
- Motto: "Victory is law."
- Strengths: Tactical mastery, unmatched offense, well-funded recruitment.
- Weaknesses: Their structured approach can be exploited by unpredictable teams like the Underbelly Thumpers.
¶ The Bearded Gnomes
Representing the Town of Pythagoras
The Bearded Gnomes are, without question, the worst team in the league. They have not had a winning season in over 30 years, and in recent years, they have gone completely winless. Their name has become synonymous with failure, but their small, devoted fanbase still shows up to every game, hoping for a miracle.
Despite their tragic record, the team is beloved in their hometown of Pythagoras. The true heart of the team is their mascot, Bennie the Bearded Gnome, a charismatic performer whose comedic antics and slapstick routines keep the crowd entertained even when the scoreboard is a disaster.
This year, there is a spark of hope in the form of Tidus Efefex, the most anticipated rookie since the legendary Big Muff himself. But while some dream of a turnaround season, the realists know the pattern—Tidus will likely leave after a year, poached by a top-tier team that can offer him both money and championships.
Their home stadium, The Hollow Barrel, is a small, old-fashioned arena known more for its excellent food and friendly atmosphere than for any actual Muffleball success.
- Motto: "Maybe this year?"
- Strengths: A dedicated, passionate fanbase and comedic resilience.
- Weaknesses: Everything else.
¶ Cultivars (Plant folks)
Representing the Verdant Coalition
The Cultivars are a team made up primarily of plantfolk—dryads, vinewalkers, and moss-touched beings. They are known for their near-supernatural endurance, a fluid team synergy that mimics the growth of a forest, and a strategy focused on gradual attrition rather than explosive plays. They thrive in damp conditions, with their home field being a sprawling, overgrown coliseum where vines creep up the goalposts. Their signature move, the "Rootlock," involves entangling opponents in a near-impenetrable web of teamwork.
- Motto: "Steady as the roots, swift as the wind."
- Strengths: Endurance, teamwork, defensive play.
- Weaknesses: Struggle against high-speed, aggressive teams like the Lords of Blades.
¶ Underbelly Thumpers
Representing the Free City of Husk
The Thumpers hail from the lawless underbelly of Husk, a city known for its black markets, smugglers, and labyrinthine tunnels. Their team is composed of bruisers, rogues, and the occasional reformed street enforcer. They play rough, bending the rules whenever possible, and their aggressive playstyle makes them a nightmare to defend against. Their home arena, The Pit, is infamous for its deafening drums that pound throughout every match, making communication difficult for opposing teams.
- Motto: "Hit hard, run fast, take everything."
- Strengths: Physicality, intimidation, deception.
- Weaknesses: Prone to penalties and chaos, inconsistent strategy.
¶ Cognosticators (Clockwork types)
Representing the Grand Clockwork Citadel)
An entirely mechanized team from the technological marvel of the Clockwork Citadel, the Cognosticators are composed of sentient constructs, golem-forged athletes, and enhanced clockwork beings. Their playstyle is highly analytical, relying on precise timing and data-driven strategies. They are known for their unique "Pre-Cog Playbook," which predicts enemy movements with eerie accuracy. Their home arena, The Gearfield, features shifting platforms and mechanical hazards that only they can fully anticipate.
- Motto: "Perfect execution, flawless victory."
- Strengths: Precision, strategy, adaptation.
- Weaknesses: Struggle against unpredictable, chaotic teams like the Thumpers.
¶ The Black Knights
Representing the Silent Dominion, home city Paragon)
The Black Knights are an enigmatic team that rarely speaks, their faces hidden behind shadowy visors. Rumored to be handpicked warriors from a secretive order, they are known for their ruthless efficiency and near-inhuman discipline. They play a cold, calculated game, never showing emotion, and rarely making mistakes. Their home stadium, The Obsidian Keep, is surrounded by towering, jet-black walls that seem to swallow sound, making it an unnerving experience for visiting teams.
- Motto: "Honor through silence. Victory through shadow."
- Strengths: Precision, discipline, defensive mastery.
- Weaknesses: Lack of spontaneity, can be outmaneuvered by unpredictable teams like the Cultivars.
¶ The Stormcallers
Representing the Tempest Isles
A team of seafarers, storm-touched mystics, and weather-hardened warriors from the Tempest Isles. The Stormcallers are known for their relentless, high-speed playstyle, resembling a raging storm that never lets up. Their ability to rapidly switch formations makes them unpredictable, and their conditioning allows them to outlast most teams in grueling matches. Their home stadium, The Maelstrom, is notorious for its magically induced wind gusts and sudden rainstorms that only the Stormcallers seem able to navigate.
- Motto: "Strike like lightning, move like the tide."
- Strengths: Speed, stamina, adaptability.
- Weaknesses: Struggles against teams with disciplined, structured defense like the Black Knights.
¶ The Ashen Vultures
Representing the Ember Wastes
Hailing from a scorched and desolate land where survival is brutal, the Ashen Vultures play with ruthless efficiency. They excel in last-minute turnarounds, waiting for their opponents to wear themselves out before capitalizing on their exhaustion. Their mascot, a massive skeletal vulture named "Emberclaw," swoops over the field before every home game, adding to their intimidation factor. Their stadium, The Charred Roost, is surrounded by firelit pyres and an ever-present haze of ash drifting from the volcanic fields beyond.
- Motto: "Endure. Strike. Feast."
- Strengths: Stamina, counterplay, psychological warfare.
- Weaknesses: Struggle in fast-paced, high-scoring matches.
¶ The Hollow Men
Representing the Forgotten Vale, outside the city of Paragon
Perhaps the most unsettling team in the league, the Hollow Men are a collection of eerie, masked players who seem to communicate without speaking. Legends claim they are former champions who played one season too many and now exist in a cursed, half-real state. Whether this is true or simply a mind game, their near-telepathic coordination on the field is undeniable. Their home stadium, The Silent Hollow, is known for its absolute quiet—no music, no announcers, just the sound of the game itself.
- Motto: "We do not speak. We do not fall."
- Strengths: Coordination, misdirection, psychological edge.
- Weaknesses: Struggle against teams that thrive in chaotic, high-contact play like the Underbelly Thumpers.
¶ The Iron Fangs
Representing the Warborn Clans
A brutal, physically dominant team composed of orcs, gnolls, and other warrior cultures. The Iron Fangs believe Muffleball is a test of raw strength and endurance, and their playstyle reflects that philosophy. They don’t win by finesse—they win by breaking the other team’s spirit. Their legendary captain, Gorvak "The Unyielding", has played for 15 seasons and is regarded as the most fearsome player in the league. Their stadium, The Bloodfang Coliseum, echoes with the chants of war drums before every game.
- Motto: "Strength decides all."
- Strengths: Physical dominance, endurance, intimidation.
- Weaknesses: Struggle against highly tactical, evasive teams like the Cognosticators.
¶ Muffleball 19-Week Season
¶ Completed Games:
Week 1: Bearded Gnomes vs. Lords of Blades (Result 0 BG 137 LoB)
Notes: Tidus Efefex's absence from this game resulted in an absolute route. The Bearded Gnomes low moral was evident from the first tip off, they floundered out of the gate and never managed to muster the grit to mount a challenge on offense or defense. An inauspicious start to an inauspicious team. Even their mascot, the usually manic Bennie the Bearded Gnome lacked his trademark charm and tenacity. The Lords of Blades Systematically dismantled this team in a way that one might go so far as to call, obscene.
Week 2: Bearded Gnomes vs. Underbelly Thumpers (Result 91 BG 16 UT)
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¶ Week 3
Bearded Gnomes vs. Cultivars
Cognosticators vs. Stormcallers
Ashen Vultures vs. Hollow Men
Black Knights vs. Iron Fangs
Lords of Blades vs. Underbelly Thumpers
¶ Week 4
Stormcallers vs. Underbelly Thumpers
Cultivars vs. Cognosticators
Bearded Gnomes vs. Ashen Vultures
Black Knights vs. Hollow Men
Iron Fangs vs. Lords of Blades
¶ Week 5
Lords of Blades vs. Cognosticators
Bearded Gnomes vs. Hollow Men
Underbelly Thumpers vs. Black Knights
Cultivars vs. Stormcallers
Iron Fangs vs. Ashen Vultures
¶ Week 6
Cognosticators vs. Hollow Men
Black Knights vs. Ashen Vultures
Bearded Gnomes vs. Stormcallers
Iron Fangs vs. Cultivars
Lords of Blades vs. Underbelly Thumpers
¶ Week 7
Bearded Gnomes vs. Cultivars (Away)
Ashen Vultures vs. Underbelly Thumpers
Cognosticators vs. Iron Fangs
Lords of Blades vs. Hollow Men
Stormcallers vs. Black Knights
¶ Week 8
Lords of Blades vs. Stormcallers
Underbelly Thumpers vs. Hollow Men
Bearded Gnomes vs. Black Knights
Cognosticators vs. Ashen Vultures
Cultivars vs. Underbelly Thumpers
¶ Week 9
Iron Fangs vs. Bearded Gnome
Lords of Blades vs. Ashen Vultures
Hollow Men vs. Cultivars
Black Knights vs. Cognosticators
Underbelly Thumpers vs. Iron Fangs
¶ Week 10
Stormcallers vs. Bearded Gnomes
Ashen Vultures vs. Cultivars
Black Knights vs. Lords of Blades
Cognosticators vs. Bearded Gnomes
Hollow Men vs. Stormcallers
¶ Week 11
Underbelly Thumpers vs. Cognosticators
Iron Fangs vs. Black Knights
Cultivars vs. Lords of Blades
Stormcallers vs. Ashen Vultures
Hollow Men vs. Iron Fangs
¶ Week 12
Bearded Gnomes vs. Cognosticators
Lords of Blades vs. Iron Fangs
Black Knights vs. Bearded Gnomes
Stormcallers vs. Cultivars
Ashen Vultures vs. Underbelly Thumpers
¶ Week 13
Bearded Gnomes vs. Lords of Blades
Iron Fangs vs. Hollow Men
Underbelly Thumpers vs. Stormcallers
Cognosticators vs. Cultivars
Ashen Vultures vs. Black Knights
¶ Week 14
Cultivars vs. Bearded Gnomes
Lords of Blades vs. Stormcallers
Underbelly Thumpers vs. Hollow Men
Iron Fangs vs. Cognosticators
Black Knights vs. Ashen Vultures
¶ Week 15
Bearded Gnomes vs. Ashen Vultures
Black Knights vs. Hollow Men
Stormcallers vs. Iron Fangs
Cognosticators vs. Lords of Blades
Cultivars vs. Underbelly Thumpers
¶ Week 16
Bearded Gnomes vs. Hollow Men
Black Knights vs. Underbelly Thumpers
Cultivars vs. Stormcallers
Ashen Vultures vs. Iron Fangs
Lords of Blades vs. Cognosticators
¶ Week 17
Bearded Gnomes vs. Stormcallers
Lords of Blades vs. Hollow Men
Iron Fangs vs. Cultivars
Cognosticators vs. Ashen Vultures
Black Knights vs. Lords of Blades
¶ Week 18
Bearded Gnomes vs. Iron Fangs
Stormcallers vs. Black Knights
Hollow Men vs. Cultivars
Ashen Vultures vs. Underbelly Thumpers
Underbelly Thumpers vs. Cognosticators
¶ Week 19
Bearded Gnomes vs. Black Knights
Lords of Blades vs. Ashen Vultures
Underbelly Thumpers vs. Cultivars
Hollow Men vs. Black Knights
Iron Fangs vs.
¶ Muffleball Rules
¶ Setup & Possession
- Each team has 5 players on the field at a time.
- The game starts with a Jump Ball (Athletics/Acrobatics contest).
- The winner gains possession, and simultaneous action selection begins.
¶ Basic Rule
- Goals are scored by catching or running the Muffleball into the opposing team’s goal.
- 1 point for running it in (Contested against any attempting to tackle)
- 2 points for pass less than 25 feet
- 3 points for pass between 26 – 50
- 6 points for pass greater than 50
- Magic is illegal during the game due to a Misty Step incident a few decades ago.
- Violence is a part of this game, dirty tricks are not encouraged but the penalties for such actions are light resulting in what some might consider incentivized cheating.
¶ Simultaneous Action Selection
- After possession is determined, the ball carrier decides their action first (Run, Pass or Special) then the other 9 players decide their actions in secret.
- Once all actions are chosen, they are revealed and resolved.
- Actions interact with each other dynamically, creating fluid, rugby-like chaos.
¶ Available Actions (Choose One Per Round)
¶ For the Ball Carrier (Possession Actions)
- Run – keep possession and run the ball. Contested athletics or acrobatics against incoming tackles. Success
- Success + 5 = Move double movement speed (Dash action)
- Success = Move your movement speed up field
- Failure = No movement
- Failure -5 = Change of possession
- Failure -10 = Change of possession and score
Pass – Throw the Muffleball to a teammate that took the “Receiver” action. Passes of 10 feet or less happen before tackle is resolved. The passer has disadvantage if one tackler is unblocked.
- DC 12 for pass less than 10 feet
- DC 15 for pass between 11-30 feet
- DC 20 for pass greater than 31 - 60 feet
- DC 25 for pass greater than 60
Special – Pitch your idea to the DM. Any inherent skills and abilities are fair game.
¶ Offensive Support
- Receiver – Move into position for a pass or try to break through a gap. Contested check against a defender taking the “Guard” action.
- Straight contest for 1 defender with the “Guard” action.
- Disadvantage for 2 defenders with the “Guard” action.
- Disadvantage for 2 defenders with the “Guard” action AND Intercept as a reaction.
- Automatic failure for 3 defenders with the “Intercept” action.
- Block – Treat like grapple. Opposed athletics or Acrobatics. Mitigate one defender taking the “Tackle” or “Guard” action.
- A player can attempt to block 2 players. This results in two separate contested Muffleball rolls with the blocker rolling with disadvantage.
¶ For Defenders
- Tackle – Stop a ball carrier in their tracks (Opposed Muffleball roll).
- 2 unblocked tacklers gain advantage on the opposed check per the help action.
- 3 unblocked tacklers also impose disadvantage on the runner/passer.
- Guard Receiver – Contested athletics or acrobatics check against receiver.
- If defenders guarding receiver out-number those taking the “Receiver” action, they can elect to impose disadvantage on the contested roll OR Intercept as a reaction.
¶ Bearded Gnome Specials:
Tidus’ Special Move: Blitz Mirage
- Activation: Tidus can attempt Blitz Mirage once per game.
- Effect: Using his signature footwork and rapid movement, Tidus fakes multiple dashes in different directions, leaving behind blurred afterimages.
- He makes a Muffleball roll (acrobatics or athletics) check (DC 15).
- On a success, defenders are thrown off completely, failing any attempts to tackle or intercept him this round.
- On a failure, he overcommits, slipping mid-movement—and loses possession of the Muffleball.
- Effect: Using his signature footwork and rapid movement, Tidus fakes multiple dashes in different directions, leaving behind blurred afterimages.
Ronnie’s Special Move: Two Birds, One Stone
- Activation: Ronnie can attempt Two Birds, One Stone once per game as a reaction.
- Effect: After receiving a pass, Ronnie can take one of the following reactions.
- Flip Pass – Advance the ball to a teammate within 30 feet. This pass is unexpected and cannot be intercepted.
- Fake Out – Nearest defender is so dumbfounded by this unorthodox move that they are stunned until the end of next round. Opposing team plays 1 player down.
- Fan Favorite – The crowd roars in excitement, inspiring Ronnie and his teammates granting bless until the end of next round.
- Effect: After receiving a pass, Ronnie can take one of the following reactions.
Torkin's Special Move: Green Shell
Once per game, Torkin gets a running start, tucks into shell, and basically becomes a "green shell" Attack roll against AC of 15 - every 2 pts above 15 knocks out a defender and gives them disadvantage on next round because Torkin crushed them
¶ Definitions
Muffleball Roll – Player’s choice of Acrobatics or Athletics.